Great Advice For New Players – League of Legends

Probably the most overused piece of "advice" in all of League of Legends. It is the quick way to dance. '/dance' takes soooooo long, just use your preset bindings, slam that d key, and boogie!

Wards are overrated, don't buy them! First of all, they only last 3 minutes. So in theory you would need to buy these ALL GAME for them to be even close to effective. Secondly, they cost 75 gold! How in hell can you purchase wards all game when you are rushing your deathcap on Soraka (gotta get dem big heals). And lastly, all the enemy has to do is buy an oracle and all those wards are instantly countered. See!? Wards are for scrubs.

Why waste 7-8 seconds recalling back to your fountain? It is a HUGE waste of time. There is another option and it has more pros than cons. All you have to do is die: It's an instant teleport back to your fountain. You get a handful of seconds of death timer to contemplate your build and make sure you are buying the correct items. And if you want to step it up a notch, take revive + teleport as your summoners and you can instantly be back in lane with full health.
Buy Eve. You can't counter her power!

Wait a minute, promote on a jungler you ask? But... you have no allied creeps in the jungle. That might be correct, but you will have crazy ganks that are basically 3v1's or 4v2's. 'Oh noes! Promoted minion is ganking me! QQ' says the enemy laner. Your response? 'HUEHUEHUEHUE!' Also be sure to re-read the 4th and 7th tip on the list. If your mid lane takes smite, your jungler has the option to take revive and promote. After a successful tower dive that kills you and forces an enemy laner to go b (making him lose xp and gold huehuehue), you can instantly be back in the jungle farming for your next gank. Too pro, too pro.

Be sure to flip out on your teammates. It will motivate them into playing better and paying closer attention to the mini-map. No one ever responds to constructive criticism anyway.