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Billy Corgan Planned His Own Death During ‘Siamese Dream’ Sessions

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Smashing Pumpkins frontman Billy Corgan has gone through a lot of struggles throughout the years. From feuding with old band members to battling depression, Corgan had a lot of issues to deal with. It got so bad that Corgan was planning to kill himself while recording the band’s 1994 breakthrough album, Siamese Dream.

NME reports that Corgan was opening up about that time in his career, stating that Siamese Dream is the one Smashing Pumpkins album that “came out the best”.

“Even though it wasn’t the one that sold the most, it’s the one that seems to have come through the best,” Corgan shares. “As dark a records as Siamese Dream is, there’s a lot of fun in it, it’s almost like we’re kind of laughing at how stupid the whole thing is. It’s like, here’s my pop song about suicide (“Today”) and here’s my epic song about child abuse (“Disarm”), and here’s my big middle finger to the indie world.”

It’s a well-known fact that Corgan suffered from severe depression. The pressure of Smashing Pumpkins enjoying mainstream success was a lot to bear. However, the musician started to have serious suicidal thoughts and started to set the wheels in motion for his death.

“I was suicidal, and I’d been plotting my own death for about two months, and if you’ve ever read anything about the warning signs of suicide one of them is you give away all your stuff, and I’d given away all my stuff, I gave away all my records, I started giving away my guitars,”says Corgan. “I was fantasizing about my own death, I started thinking what my funeral would be like and what music would be played, I was at that level of insanity.”

Corgan went on to justify his re-recording of parts played by former guitarist James Iha and former bassist D’Arcy Wretzky on Siamese Dream, as well as the Pumpkins’ 1991 debut album Gish. This inevitably led to tension in the band and their first breakup.

The Smashing Pumpkins are preparing the release of their ninth studio album, Oceania, which is due out early next year.

Does this news about Billy Corgan surprise you? Share your thoughts below.

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