How to Make a Michigander Mad (Spoiler: You Don’t Want To)
Michiganders for the most part are nice and welcoming people. We have a Midwestern hospitality but we also can get feisty if you piss us off. That’s something you want to avoid.
Think of this as a guide as to what not to do/say in front of someone from Michigan. Don’t use it to be an ass
Order a Basic Beer
Seriously, you will get a weird look if you order something you can get anywhere else. You’re in Michigan! It has some of the best beers and local breweries in the entire country. The options are endless… you WILL find something that fits your palette.
So don’t even think about ordering a “bud!” You need a craft brew!
Say You’re an Ohio State Fan
Not only will you piss off Michigan State and U of M fans but pretty much every other Michigander.
Ask for a “Soda”
It’s pop. And with Faygo being a [Detroit] Michigan staple, you have all different types of pops to choose from: red pop, orange pop, grape pop, etc. Keyword: POP!
Throw Away a Bottle or Can in the Garbage
Don’t you dare throw it away! We will come after you.
That can of pop you’re about to toss is worth money in Michigan! We get 10¢ back for the glass/plastic bottles or cans we recycle (bottle return). Just think of all the money you could get back after a having a house party!
Say How Cold it is
DUH! We know it’s cold. But chances are it’s not as cold as you think it is at the moment.
What’s cold to you is probably warm to us. After months of a brutal winter, the second it hits around 40-45° you’ll start to see some people wearing shorts. Cold to us is anything 20° or below.
I’m not saying you’ll never hear a Michigander complain about the weather but getting to experience all four seasons is worth it!
Ask if Detroit is Scary
This may be more localized but Detroit isn’t scary, it’s awesome!
The city, unfortunately, has gotten a really bad reputation throughout the years but just like any other major city, in any other state, it’s got its bad neighborhoods that you avoid. But Downtown Detroit itself has so much to offer.
Since declaring bankruptcy, the city has continued to revitalize. After spending an entire day and night in Downtown Detroit, you will regret ever asking such a silly question.
Say that the Ocean is Better than the Lake
Don’t even start. Not only is are Michiganders never more than 6 miles away from a body of water but we have the best lakes ever!
Sure the ocean is cool but at least we don’t have to worry about sharks when we’re in the water. You also will see some of the best views from a lake in Michigan, especially the Great Lakes.
Until you spend a summer day at the lake in Michigan, you have no room to talk.
Leave the U.P. Off the Map
Poor Yoopers. I don’t know why people seem to forget that Michigan isn’t just the Mitten but cross the bridge and you enter a whole new world known as the Upper Peninsula (just call it the U.P.)
Visit pretty much any place in the U.P. and you will never forget it or leave it off a map again… or completely botch what it looks like.