A man tried to grab cash from a register at the Burger King on Pearl Street downtown Grand Rapids and the GRPD's got fast food puns... as one does.

GRPD shared a photo of the suspect to Facebook, saying he'd asked for change from a BK employee, then tried to swipe some cash once the register was open.

But the suspect wasn't quick enough.

As GRPD tells it, he was "not so #FreakyFast as one employee was able to prevent the suspect from obtaining any #SourDOUGHbreadbowl."

The would-be ham-burglar (wrong restaurant, I know, but GRPD is cross-punning it up, so...) is described as a white male, 40-50 years old, approximately 5'8" and 150 lbs. Anyone with info should contact Silent Observer.

Oh. And he's driving a "#GOLDENarchescolored minivan."

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