At Least One Michigan Man Should Never Drive Again
This is not some overreaction to the idiots driving the wrong way down one way streets during Artprize. Or the people not paying any attention downtown, as they try to find that "one kick ass art thing I heard my friend say he saw downtown". This is about a real guy pulled over in Lake Orion, MI, who's a bit of a danger to society.
Douglas Bowman, of Orion Township, has had his driver's license suspended before his recent arrest. A few times...okay, a bunch of times...alright, let's be honest...it's been suspended 31 FREAKING TIMES! AND he's been charged with drunk driving EIGHT TIMES!
Are you freaking KIDDING ME?
How do you let someone keep a license and allow them to drive after being charged with 8 DUIs? How do you allow it after 31 suspensions?
Sounds like someone is slipping through some bureaucracy stuff right there. You know the cops don't want this a-hole driving around. You KNOW no one else wants him on the road!
But at least the arrest report has a funny in it:
After being stopped, a Lake Orion officer reports the man told him he did not have a valid driver's license and noticed the man had "urinated in his pants," according to the release.
Another strike against him. If you can't hold in your pee, you probably shouldn't be allowed to do things adults get to do. Like drive, vote, be seen in public without supervision, or shake hands with people. Seriously, dude don't freaking touch me.