You'd think that an escaped lion, elephant, or anaconda would be a zoo's biggest safety concern, but apparently zebras can get loose, too. One Japanese zoo decided to stage an emergency drill earlier this week simulating the recapture of an escaped zebra, except that the zebra in the drill isn't a zebra at all.

It's a dude in a zebra suit.

First, the zebra-man wanders about a bit aimlessly, but when zookeepers try to form a net barrier, the zebra crashes right on through, probably fatally injuring one of the guys holding the net.

Because f**k the Zoo Police.

But the best part of the entire video is when the zebra is finally shot with an imaginary tranquilizer dart. His dramatic fall to the ground deserves an Oscar. And for the cherry on top, a woman in a van pokes the tranqued zebra's butt with a stick.

Are they hiring? I could totally do this professionally.

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