For Just $5 You Can Definitely Get Haunted By This Doll For Sale In A Lansing Facebook Group
Are you eager for a paranormal experience?
Looking to be haunted by a demonic entity?
Or are you just a fan of the "Chucky" franchise?
If you answered yes to any of those questions, do we have a deal for you!
Check out this vintage, handcrafted Amish boy doll for sale in Buy and Sell in the Lansing Area Facebook group. Here's more info from the listing:
Amish boy doll. Eyes open and close. Hand sewn and dressed by the Pennsylvania Dutch. Vintage toy. Rare find. Impressive in size. Measures 6 inches tall.
You hear that? The eyes even open and close. How comforting!
Don't get it twisted. My genuine fear of this toy isn't about the good, God-fearing people of the Pennsylvania Dutch community. It's more about the genuinely unsettling face on this thing.
Speaking of, did you know Amish dolls are often faceless? That choice was meant to symbolize that all are alike in the eyes of God. Some Amish dolls, like the most certainly accursed one we're talking about here, do have faces, though.
Also, as long as we're on the topic, we should probably clarify that the Pennsylvania Dutch aren't all Amish. Some are. But the terms are often incorrectly used interchangeably. The Amish are a religious community with extremely specific and dogged conventions. The Pennsylvania Dutch are a cultural community with a collection of different faiths, values, and lifestyles.
Anyway, $5 seems likes one hell (ha!) of a deal for a scare. That's less than half the price of a ticket to a horror movie, and the return on investment between the two choices here is vast. On the one hand, you get 90 minutes to two hours of spookiness. But with the doll, you'll have a lifetime of inescapable, unholy terror that can end only with the kind of cleansing afforded by fire — either by burning the doll, or through your immortal soul's incineration for all eternity.