I Need Your Help Solving This Confusing Billboard

Ever since I started working here, one thing has evaded me, leaving me utterly aloof every time I see it. Whenever I see this thing, I emphatically ask whoever is in the car with me what they think it means. To my validation (and my chagrin), they too don't know what it means.

My pride has taken a real hit. I have exhausted every effort to figure out what this thing means. I have now come to my last resort. I come to all of you to ask one thing:

WTF Does This Billboard in West Michigan Mean?

I drive past this billboard northbound on US-131 every single day. Yes, I understand the overall message of this billboard is don't text and drive, which is great and I agree (and for clarification, I was a passenger in the car when I took this photo). However, the emoji choice on the left completely throws me for a loop. Old man, barbershop thing, cool guy with Fred from "Scooby Doo" hair? Is the old man a doctor? What does this have to do with texting and driving?

So, I did some digging. The billboard is from the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) and is part of their "Text and Whatever, Just Don't Text and Drive" campaign. Which is unique, but also makes it harder for me to figure it out because it could be about anything. 

My best guess has been "Text and Thrive, Just Don't Text and Drive" which is possible but doesn't feel right. At this point, I spend so much time trying to decipher the message I may as well be a hazard on the road.

I found a discussion on Reddit that dates back FOUR YEARS, and people still don't have an answer to the actual meaning of this billboard. It does have one excellent guess that I will not say here to not influence any guesses, however, if you DO have any guesses, comment below or feel free to DM me on Instagram @tommy140_.

For my sanity's sake, please throw me a bone.