"It's a Christmas Miracle!" Aren't these words everyone wants to hear during the holidays? This Christmas, you could hear "God bless us, every one" from a very special Kentwood man, if you help him with his Christmas need.
I've never heard of "cranking" before this, and now I fear it's like "The Ring". I can only escape the clutches of this disturbing new knowledge by sharing with unsuspecting innocents. I apologize in advance for inflicting this upon you.