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Monkeys on a Safari Tour Decide To Scar a Girl for Life By Humping on Her Family Car [Video]

There's nothing like a family vacation. You get to visit new places, see new things, share a room with your embarrassing parents, learn about sex from monkeys...wait, that's not supposed to happen! 

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Category: Animals, Humor, Videos Tags: , ,
Safe Sex
Sven Hoppe/Thinkstock
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Don’t Want Kids But Are Afraid to Get a Vasectomy? Get a Sperm Switch Installed!

A German carpenter has come up with a brilliant new procedure for men's birth control, that doesn't require a vasectomy. For some reason, doctors never came up with this idea, so score one for the good guys!

It's a switch under the skin that's on the tube that carries sperm from the testicles. Flick, no sperm can come out, flick again, and the highway is back open. Genius!

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Category: Health, Humor, News Tags: , ,
Israel Pioneers Use Of Medical Marijuana
Getty Images
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Sexxpot is the New Designer Weed to Help Women Have Mind-Blowing Sex!

Have you wanted to have the most mind-blowing sex, yet also want to be stoned AF? Well, a quick trip to San Francisco might be an idea for you, to pick up some Sexxpot!

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Category: Health, Humor, News Tags: , ,
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Babypod – The Newest Vibrator Masquerading as a Hippie Baby Invention [Video]

What will people think of next? Obviously it will be something involving a vagina, because let's all face it...they're always on our minds. This new device, the Babypod, is the latest hippie idea to let your fetus enjoy "unruffled" music in the womb...but basically sticking a speaker in your vagina.

This is not a joke.

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Category: Humor, News, Videos Tags: , ,
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“The Nightmare Before XXXmas” Looks Like the Best Adult Christmas Movie Ever [Video]

This week has been a weird one for Christmas. Maybe it's the weirdness on the interwebs, or the fact that I need a girlfriend, but there's A LOT of Christmas-themed porn stuff out there right now! This could be the best parody movie of "Nightmare Before Christmas" out there...and it has naked people in it!

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Category: Christmas, Humor, Videos Tags: , , ,
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Hot Girls Try to Sing Silent Night While Riding a Sybian Sex Machine [Video]

Christmas is the time for giving. Okay, that could mean presents like socks and crap, but maybe for the holidays we can step up our game a bit. Let's give something everyone likes! Orgasms! And we'll throw in something like...um...Christmas Carols with it...yeah, that sounds good!

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How The Grinch Stole Christmas as Read By Beautiful Porn Stars [Video]

Christmas isn't only for kids. Everyone should be able to enjoy this holiday, and not just for the presents! Well, I guess you could call this a present. Gathering together a bunch of beautiful porn star babes, and having them read Christmas stories!

That's exactly what this is! You won't watch the movie ever again, or read the book. Why should you, when you can watch these amazing ladies read the story to you?

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Category: Christmas, Videos Tags: , , , ,
JW WTF
Who WOULDN'T want to be with this? HAHA (Johnnie Walker)
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Ann Arbor Hottie Looking For Love By Mistake on The Bachelor Because I’m Right Here!

Apparently, the 20th season of The Bachelor is about to start up on TV, and I have yet to see a single episode of this show. I'm pretty sure I've got a grasp on the plot: Rando dude looking to bang as many girls as he can on TV until he finds the woman he wants to "marry". An unknown number of women who want to be on TV join him for whatever romance they can squeeze out of the show, hoping he'll turn out to be a nice guy.

Close?

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Category: Humor, TV Tags: , , ,
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John Mcallister/Thinkstock
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Chinese Couple Getting Weight Loss Surgery So They Can Finally Have Sex

Lin Yue and Deng Yang are madly in love, with both each other, and food. Their relationship problems have gone on for a long time. They couldn't find a wedding dress to fit on the bride, and then they discovered that their bellies are too big, and they can't consummate their marriage!

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What Do Michiganders Search For Most on Pornhub?

Pornhub, who had some of the most creative ads for a while, has been doing a LOT of ANALysis on the traffic to their site. What do people search for most, how long are they spending looking at these things, and where are they?

Then they broke out that data for us all to be completely embarrassed by.

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Category: Infographics, Science Tags: , ,
Sasha Grey Fleshlight
Sasha Grey Fleshlight
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Clueless Mom Asks the Internet to Explain What Her Son’s Fleshlight Is

Patty Parsons, the Internet's most recent clueless mom, recently posted a photo on Twitter of her son's masturbation toy, asking people what it was. The Internet, in all its cruel glory, was kind enough to explain it to her in graphic detail.

Her poor CJ (son), has now been outed as a shower masturbator to the entire world.

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Category: Humor Tags: , , ,
Mating domestic cats - sex in nature
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You Might Need to Be Having More Sex to Be Happy – Surprise!

Amy Muise, sex and romance "scientist" (how do I get THAT job?) at the University of Toronto Missisauga has conducted a study over 23 YEARS with her team, to determine how happy people are, and how they can be happy. Mostly with sex, sometimes with money. What did she discover?

If you have more sex, you're generally happier. SURPRISE!

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Category: Science Tags: , ,

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