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dahmer before dark

(Photo by Mark Dadswell/Getty Images)
(Photo by Mark Dadswell/Getty Images)
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Meet The Guy With Exploding Testicles! – Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day [AUDIO]

Hey Dahmer here with another great story.

A guy was getting a mole removed from  his butt, and the methane from the fart he ripped sparked the electric mole cutting knife and his balls went up in flames!

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(Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images)
(Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images)
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How To Get Out Of Baby Sitting Your Stripper Girlfriends Bastard Child – Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day [AUDIO]

Hey it's Dahmer here with another one that proves people are just stupid. If you're a little kid and your mom is a drunk, high stripper whore and your moms boyfriend is drunk felon who just lays around all day....odds are pretty good your in store

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(Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images)
(Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images)
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Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day – Stripping For Jesus [AUDIO]

Dahmer here again with another great piece of information. Girls you don't have to snort lines of coke off the bartenders d#ck, and make sex in the Champagne room in order to have some fun swinging around a stripper pole!

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(Photo by China Photos/Getty Images)
(Photo by China Photos/Getty Images)
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Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day – People Are F’in Crazy [AUDIO]

Hey it's Dahmer here with another story that just proves no matter where you live people are crazy. A little old Chinese lady who lived in a Chinese ghetto built a cage around her house because she was scared of Chinese gang bangers.

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(Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images)
(Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images)
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Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day -A Rat takes A Big Bite Of A Man’s Hot Dog [AUDIO].

Hey it's Dahmer here again with a story that just proves you can sue for anything. A NY prison inmate is suing the state after a giant prison rat took a bite out of his penis! WTF

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(Photo by Joe Raedle/Getty Images)
(Photo by Joe Raedle/Getty Images)
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Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day – This Is Not The Best Way To Beat A Breathalyzer [AUDIO]

Hey Dahmer here again with one you won't believe.

This is the sickest one the world have ever heard! You have never heard anything this gross! A guy tried to beat a DUI by shoving his own feces down his throat!

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Tim Defrisco/Getty Images
Tim Defrisco/Getty Images
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Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day – Guy’s Guts Ripped Out By Truck [AUDIO]

Hey it's Dahmer here again with a story about one of the worse ways to die I can think of.

A hillbilly guy took his old lady muddin, and ended up with his guts literally sprayed all over the forest!

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(Photo by Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images)
(Photo by Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images)
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Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day – Girls Dies From Boyfriends Vomit

Hey it's Dahmer here again with another story you need to hear.

This is a horrible story about a guy who's vomit sent his girlfriend to her death!

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(Photo by Charley Gallay/Getty Images for 7-Eleven)
(Photo by Charley Gallay/Getty Images for 7-Eleven)
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Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day – This Is A Good Way Not To Rob A 7-11 [AUDIO]

Hey it's Dahmer here with another great piece of advice.
Sometimes guys that rob 7-11's are just plain stupid!

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(Photo by Christopher Furlong/Getty Images)
(Photo by Christopher Furlong/Getty Images)
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Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day -Do You Love Goat Balls You Big Sick Freak?[AUDIO]

Hey Dahmer here with a simple question for you guys.

How would ya like to bite into a nice big slimy goat testicle?  Or maybe you could turn it into a game and see who can stick the most goat balls in their mouth at one time!

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(Photo by Paula Bronstein /Getty Images)
(Photo by Paula Bronstein /Getty Images)
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Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day -Dahmer Is Getting Married!! [AUDIO]

Hey it's Dahmer here with some great news for you guys.

I've finally decided to do it!  Yep, I'm getting married!  To a hot, tight, juicy blond Russian chick!   And she might even have a sister for you!

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(Photo Illustration by Dan Kitwood/Getty Images)
(Photo Illustration by Dan Kitwood/Getty Images)
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Dahmer’s B.S. Story Of The Day -Send Your Online Girlfriend Money!

Dahmer here again with more dating advice for all you guys.

Hey guys, if your lonely and horny you might want to think about getting yourself and online girlfriend.  Just remember to send her ALL your money! Hahahahahaha!

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