Poopsie Slime Surprise is the Most Audacious Toy Commercial Ever [VIDEO]

One toy company is willing to bet it all that your kid has been waiting to play with poop.

As is often the case in a house predominantly occupied by younglings, our television is at the mercy of my children in the daytime. They left the room while the Disney Channel or Cartoon Network was on the other day, and this commercial actually got me to laugh out loud and look up from my phone -- two things that usually do not happen while it's kiddie TV time.

I believe it was the line "my poops" being sung repeatedly that caught my attention, but it was the toy's concept that held it. This is a toy that is actually s#!+. No subtlety or innuendo -- they straight up encourage your kids to play with poop. That's their pitch.

I couldn't believe my eyes or ears. Someone actually spent a lot of money to market this... LOTS of money. Not to mention all the countless meetings they must've had to decide things like what color the poop should be, whether they should actually refer to it as poop (spoiler alert -- they do) and what not. It's a little much when you start thinking about all the effort put into this s***ty toy.

Think about it, they had to hire someone to write a song about a poop toy for girls. Chances are they had to listen to multiple different versions of songs about poop slime from different artists. Somebody (probably several somebodies) wrote a poop song that didn't make the cut. Imagine being a struggling jingle musician and having to tell your significant other that you didn't get the unicorn poop gig and that the wedding would have to wait until next year.

I was even more astounded to learn that this is just an accessory to a larger toy -- a unicorn baby doll thing that makes the poop (see that commercial below). So not only did they come up with this ridiculous toy based on the premise that little girls want to play with poop, they decided to spin off the poop into its own marketing campaign. I wish I could've been a fly on the wall at the meeting where they made that decision.

I'll be the first to tell you that there is so much I don't understand about what kids are into, but this one definitely trumps all the dumb music and innocuous YouTubers that youths worship these days. This company is saying, "hey kids -- play with this piece of s**t," and these kids couldn't be happier. Who says you can't win by giving up? Certainly not this company... or the company that made a game where you plunge poop out of a toilet. Seriously, WTF is going on?