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JT: Sports Soothsayer — Weekend Sports Predictions (10-14-11)

Photo by Ronald Martinez/Getty Images

Predictions from soothsayer JT.

I predict I will be divorced by Monday for sloth-like behavior such as refusing to bathe for fear of missing a play, screaming incessantly at the TV umps/refs for what I perceive as bad calls and the infamous “You never listen” which unless there is a color commentary attached this weekend, I simply won’t.

* The Tigers cut the Texas Rangers’ lead to 3-2 in the American League championship series and will even the series Saturday night in game 6 by killing the dreaded Rangers and then will finish them off  in game 7 on Sunday.  Of course all of this dependent on the Rangers Nelson Cruz suffering a twisted ankle “accident” that oddly enough, happens in a dark alley on the streets of Detroit.

* The Lions will whip the 49ers on Sunday and will have their first 6-0 start since 1956.  Know what team the lions beat when they opened 6-0 that year?  It was 17-13 victory over…none other than…the San Francisco 49ers. BAM!  How’s that for being freakishly weird?

*The Wolverines have a noon showdown in East Lansing, a physically and mentally exhausting dogfight that rivals the Blues vs. Greens Chariot races in the Byzantine Empire Ah…but alas, a bizarre twist of fate happened in 532 AD when the two groups briefly put aside their differences and turned on the reigning Emperor, burning down the city. But then after being paid off by a longtime supporter of their cause—the Blues turned on the Greens and left them to be slaughtered by the menacing imperial army.  So basically, going solely on historical fact: Green gets slaughtered by Blue.

* The Wings play Minnesota Saturday night and because the WILD have the most annoying mascot I predict the spirit of Bob Probert will manifest itself inside a crazed fan who  will bash out Nordys irritating white toothy veneers.  Prediction: Wings 4 Wild 1

It’s one of the greatest Michigan sports weekends in recent memory so enjoy!  Which Michigan sports teams do you think will win or lose?

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