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How to Survive a Shark Attack – Last Man Standing

doobybrain, Flickr

Some people (naming no names here) spend an awful lot of time worrying about shark attacks. While statistically, the chance of a carnivorous fish ripping a huge chunk of meat off your body is pretty slim, it does happen on occasion. Most sharks aren’t really interested in human beings, but a few of them do like to take a nibble, or a whopping big bite now and again. The top culprits are, in order of the likelihood of attack, tiger sharks, bull sharks and great whites.

We want you to survive any potential shark assault looming in your future, so you can keep on reading entertaining and informative articles like this one. With that goal in mind, here are a few tips that just might save your life when ‘Jaws’ is coming for you.

Don’t Swim

If you really have a deathlike fear of sharks, stay the hell out of the water. Really, it’s that simple. If you want to swim outside, try a lake or river instead, away from any salt water estuaries. If you absolutely have to go into the sea, keep to the shallows. Most of the larger sharks that could end your life probably won’t venture into extremely shallow water, or stay there too long.

Don’t Bleed and Don’t Pee

Sharks have an amazing sense of smell. They can detect the minutest traces of bodily fluids from miles away. Of course blood draws them in, but urine can also arose their curiosity. If you’re a surfer who has spent long hours in the water, you’ve probably warmed up your wetsuit with a bit of pee. It doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to paddle into shore and take a leak. If the area you’re surfing in is rife with sharks, don’t empty your entire bladder in one massive go. Just squirt a little bit out at a time.

If you’re a women who happens to be menstruating, or someone who has sustained a nasty cut while swimming (from coral, perhaps), get out of the water as fast as you can, before a hungry shark tracks you down by the scent of your blood.

Don’t Play Dead, and Don’t Thrash About

Sharks aren’t bears. Playing dead just doesn’t work with them. If you’re floating around like a listless blob of protein, you’re just inviting a shark in. It will simple assume dinner is being served.

And the same goes for thrashing about in a panic. Don’t do it, no matter how scared you are. Wild movements make you look like a wounded animal, a.k.a. ‘easy prey.’ If a shark thinks you’re already in trouble, it just might do you the unwanted favor of finishing you off.

Aim For The Eyes, Gills and Nose

If you find yourself in the very unfortunate situation of having to fend off an actual shark attack, try and jab or strike the predator in the eyes, gills or nose. These are the vulnerable spots on a shark. A strong blow to one of these areas can disorient the shark, giving you enough time to make your escape, and get out of the water.

Watch For Signs

If you see schools of fish, or marine mammals, racing off in a panic and getting out of dodge, take the hint. They’ll be able to spot or sense a shark long before you do. And if you notice a shark circling, or darting back and forth and looking for an angle, that means it’s getting ready for an attack. Again, try and get out of the water as quickly as possible. Hesitation can cost you a limb, or even your life.

Millions of people venture into the ocean every year, and only a couple of hundred are attacked annually. The odds are in your favor of never having to deal with such a frightening experience, but, as the Boy Scout motto goes, you should always be prepared.

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