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Happy (Buy) Valentine’s (Gifts at the Last Minute at the Convenience Store) Day!

I know it’s an awkward title for Valentine’s Day headlined above, but I think it’s more accurate for a lot of guys.  

If you remembered to order those cute custom bears, or maybe the amazing gold-tipped rose thing, or even the fresh-dipped strawberry things, then good for you, dude!  

You are totally focused on getting laid today!

If you made this happen:

Angela Flower
Make all the girls in the office feel special (photo John Walker)

Or even went to the trouble of this:

Jackie Flowers 2
Jackie Green’s flowers today (Photo: John Walker)

Then you are pretty much guaranteed a little, later on.

But this post is for the rest of us. If you totally forgot to do something today, it’s NOT TOO LATE!

A lot of convenience stores are adequately equipped to hook you up for a little nookie before the night is through.  Some will have flowers, I once found a flower at a convenience store made from a pair of sexy panties she could then wear!  But pretty much all of them will have candy:

VD Candy
VD Candy on the rack; you should also grab those breath mints, dude. (Photo: John Walker)

They’ll even hook you up with some of her favorite binge-and-cry food, in case you forget to take the stuff out of the convenience store bag when you give it to her:

VD Ice Cream
You caused this, and she’ll never let it go; get used to it. (Photo: John Walker)

Or, in case you are THAT GUY, and I DO NOT ADVISE OR ENDORSE THIS AT ALL, you could sneak over to that co-worker’s desk while she’s away, and totally steal the flowers her amazing man got her to take your girl.  

This would not only make you the worst boyfriend/husband, but also the sleaziest co-worker possible.

I’m not sure if there’s an award show for that.

Yet.

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