From The Bar Stool: Piranha Chews Off Wisconsin Guys Penis in 30 Seconds!
I'm no stranger to weird nights drinking at various Grand Rapids establishments and I hear a ton of messed up crap! This is one of those tales. It's another edition of From the Bar Stool.
Holy Piranha-penis! I was murdering the beers at Gippers last week, ran into a guy who told me this story, it was freaking crazy! A 34 year old from Wisconsin was out fishing on Lake Winnebago, when he thought he caught a blue gill, but it was actually a piranha!
Yeah. The kind that eat people in the Amazon! So, as the dude was taking it off the hook, he got freaked out when he noticed the teeth, accidentally dropped it and somehow it fell into his shorts-- where the piranha chewed off his entire penis in 30 seconds! Can you believe that crap man! Actually, I'm pretty sure the dude telling me this story might have a slight meth addiction and can't vouch for that part... but that headline sure got your attention, eh guys?
After further research from the Dahmer Institute, my team discovered that a Wisconsin dude did really catch a piranha recently, but that was it. The DNR guys said it was probably someone's pet fish that they let go in the lake and it would have probably died sometime during the winter.