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Johnnie Walker

I've never been good at filling these things out, but here it goes. I like long walks in cold mountain air, preferably with snow on the ground. I enjoy drinking fine soda by the crackling fire, and deep tissue massage. I hope to one day grow up an become and astronaut, so I can fly to Venus to see if that's really where women come from. If it's true, I'll bring one back for you, too. Unless it's a dude you want, and then you're out of luck...sorry. My favorite month is October, because Halloween is the best holiday ever! It allows me to openly proclaim my love and obsession with scary movies without being seen as some sort of lunatic. Okay, not too much of a lunatic. I'm a huge fan of rock and metal music, and you'll often hear me blasting the control room speakers into oblivion every night during my show. My engineer doesn't like me very much, since he has to fix them. Sorry, Mike.

Mastodon Gets a Cat Stoned and Shows You Its Dreams in New Video

Seriously, take a cat, teach it to read, let it read Alice In Wonderland, then get it stoned. When it goes to sleep, it will dream THIS crazy video from Mastodon!

It starts of as a cute little kitty, and then meets some voodoo-priest teddy bears, drinks some 'milk', and then becomes a nightmare kitty, traveling through weirdo stoner visions of...well, just watch the video.

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Category: Metal, Music, Videos Tags: , ,
Bean and cheese burrito
Brand X Pictures/Thinkstock

Hot Model Inhales Two Pound Burrito in Under Two Minutes! [Video]

Models aren't really known for their eating abilities. Usually you'll hear more about their vomit-skills, or their starvation-stats. But this model from New Zealand, Nela Zisser, took on a burrito eating challenge. The goal: eat a two pound burrito in under two minutes.

Did she get it done?

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Category: Contest, Food, Videos Tags: , , ,
Iron Maiden The Book of Souls
(BMG Music/USA)

Iron Maiden Announce New Double Album ‘The Book Of Souls’ For September


Iron Maiden are about to release their 16th album this summer, on September 4th, called 'The Book of Souls'! I'm such a huge Maiden fan, I've been geeking out about this all day. This is also their first double album, clocking in at something like 92 minutes!

They wrote this one a bit differently, with a lot of the music being written in the studio, rather than being brought in a tweaked by the band. They also recorded it in the same studio in Paris, with Kevin Shirley, that they'd recorded 'Brave New World'.

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Beats on a hottie
(via Instagram/Pattycakes713)

Beats Headphones Torn Apart by an Engineer Shows How Cheap They Are

These Beats headphones are everywhere! With Dr. Dre behind them, and then Apple spending big bucks for the company, people have been flocking to the brand to drop $200 on 'the best headphones around'.

But, as you can see when an engineer takes them apart, they're cheaply made, and use off-the-shelf generic parts. There's really nothing that makes them durable and long-lasting, and a lot of the weight comes from useless parts just thrown in there!

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Category: Technology Tags: , ,
German Astronaut Alexander Gerst Aboard The International Space Station
(Photo by Alexander Gerst / ESA via Getty Images)

UrtheCast Releases the First Full Color HD Video of Earth From Space [Video]

There have been a ton of photos released from space before, with amazing detail, even thought their taken from many, many miles away. Heck, the International Space Station is like, 270 miles away from earth, and they can read the newspaper you're sitting with on the park bench!

But, HD video hasn't been a thing. Until now.

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Category: Technology, Videos Tags: , , ,
Mid adult Caucasian couple dining in a restaurant with blindfolds over eyes.
(Ron Chapple Stock/Thinkstock)

Apparently Everyone is as Confused as I Am About Dating [Video]

Struggling through the single life, like me? Things have gotten weird, right? With Tinder and all the tech people have now, it can be weird to date. Or to even know if you're out ON a date. People don't so much ask anyone out on dates anymore, it's not 'let's hang out', or just meeting up with friends. Confusing, right?

Whether you're good at dating or not, this video should make you feel a bit better about yourself.

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Category: Videos Tags: ,
28th Annual Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame Induction Ceremony - Show
(Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)

Clueless Rolling Stone Finally Gets Rush on The Cover

It only took 40-odd years of Rush being an amazing band with tons of fans for Rolling Stone to figure out that there's something to it. Or maybe they haven't, and just made a lucky mistake. Rolling Stone is a terrible magazine for music.

My hatred of the mag aside, it's about time they put Rush on the cover, and just in time, since this will probably be the last tour for the Canadian band.

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Dwayne Johnson
(Photo by Frazer Harrison/Getty Images)

The Rock is Starring in the Remake of ‘Big Trouble in Little China’

I'm not sure how I feel about this remake of 'Big Trouble in Little China'. I like Dwayne Johnson, I think he was hysterical in 'Pain and Gain'. He's made some... interesting film choices... like 'Tooth Fairy', but some amazing movies, too. You know you love him. 'The Rundown' is a great movie.

But 'Big Trouble in Little China' is a masterwork of action and hilarity.

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The New DOOM Gameplay Looks Freaking Amazing [Video]

E3 is destroying gamer minds right now, with some amazing stuff coming out soon. Fallout 4, Hololens, and one thing I've been looking forward to, the new DOOM!

I've loved DOOM since the original, even though I've always sucked at it. The whole thing is cool. Hell, Mars, advanced weapons...what's not to love about this kill-fest? You get to run around with a weapon called the BFG9000, for Pete's sake!

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Category: Gaming, Videos Tags: , ,
Silhouette of man playing saxophone
"My wife never has to know about you, me, and Kenny G!" (Photo Comstock/Thinkstock)

Heavy Metal Fans Cheat Less on Their Partners

There was a survey don't recently by and affairs website, Victoria Milan, to discover what kinds of music people who cheat listen to. Some people would think that metal fans would be disloyal, deviant, and ready for cheating on their significant others.

But apparently, it's the classy jazz peeps who like to do the extracurricular activities. Sleazy, jazz scum.

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Category: News, Opinion Tags: , , , ,
Megadeth Live
(Photo Johnnie Walker)

Enjoy Awesome Acoustic Guitar Percussion Cover of Megadeth’s ‘Killing Is My Business’ [Video]

Megadeth is in the studio, working on their 15th studio album, and you get photos and videos of the recording on their PledgeMusic page. It will be a few more months before it comes out, so in the meantime, enjoy this cool acoustic guitar percussion cover of their classic 'Killing is My Business...'!

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Category: Music, Videos Tags: , , ,

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